Sunday, January 16, 2011

What a Week

It's not been a good week around here. Winter weather kicked in with a vengeance and we had an ice storm on Sunday night that cancelled local schools Monday and Tuesday. Plus made it very unpleasant to be outside at all--we just aren't equipped for that stuff down here. Everything stops! My little girl has been sick since Wednesday, coughing and burning up with fever. Turns out she has bronchitis, poor little thing. She's been out of school all week long.
Between the weather and Josie's bronchitis and all the ensuing chaos, I totally let myself go this week. I binged for 5 days straight. Muffins for breakfast every day, comfort foods like fried chicken and mac n cheese for lunch. Cookies, candy bars, donuts, you name it. They all were stuffed down my throat. A couple of the days I actually ate four entire meals plus too many snacks...we are talking thousands of calories here. I didn't drink any water, and vegetables were nonexistent scarce.
As you can probably imagine, eating this way made me feel like shit. I had no energy whatsoever and spent the majority of my time laying down. All I wanted to do was sleep. I also felt pretty crappy mentally and knew I needed to turn things around but I never did. I did (somehow) manage to get in my 30 minutes of movement in each day, but the majority of the time it wasn't really exercise. I got in one stair climbing session on Wednesday, and that was the only time I raised my heart rate.
Yesterday and today, I am slowly crawling out of my funk. Moving more, eating less, drinking water. I'm trying to flush out my system. I really don't want anymore grease and sugar...I've been craving green smoothies this weekend, and I've been drinking them. I'm trying to be kinder to my body now after a week of abuse. This afternoon, I'm planning to go on a 4 mile run and I'm really looking forward to it.
I'm not excited about weighing in tomorrow, but I'm just going to look the number in the eye and deal with it. It doesn't define me, and it doesn't make me a bad person.
Part of me is wondering if I am sabotaging myself because I was so close to being under 200 lbs?? I think I'm just crazy enough to do that.
No matter, life goes on. Hopefully this week will be better than last week, and more importantly I hope my daughter gets better. I can handle the food battle, but seeing my baby sick is making me crazy!

3 comments:

  1. Yep, sabotage is a very real issue. And here's your wake up call as a final kick in the butt cause I care about you...the number DOES define you, it defines us all, society won't have it any other way. People will associate you with your weight, until you don't have it anymore. Yes, weight is defining, but thankfully not PERMANENTLY defining. Glad to hear you are out of the rut and back on the horse. Get your butt into onederland already!! ;-) We are all pulling for you!


    Polar's Mom
    www.polarspage.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, man, what a week you had!! Hopefully things turn around for you this week...like the above comment said, we are all pulling for you! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am so sorry that your daughter is sick. I hope that she feels better real soon because I personally know that bronchitis sucks!

    I am sorry to hear that you had a binge week but I am esctatic that you recognize that it caused you to feel bad physically. Now, let's get those good foods going again. And like everyone else I am pulling for ya!

    ReplyDelete